His Cross To Bear
by BTech
Summary: Edwards life was never the same after he sees Bella.He waits until shes old enough to love him.To bad she doesnt have a choice.Shes his soulmate.He would do anything for there love.Even kidnap her, after all its for her own good. Dominate Edward.
1. Prologue

**Bella's POV**

Prologue:

I felt a sharp light hit my eyes.

I slowly opened them.

I gasped as I took in my new surroundings. I was in the most beautiful room I've ever seen. The walls were a soft golden color. I was lying on a huge four post bed.

I was getting more and more confused. Why am I here and where am I?

I got up to quickly. But staggered.

A shot of pain went straight to my head.

All I could here was a ringing in my ears

I yelped and closed my eyes in pain and my hands instinctually arouse to rub it.

I was shocked when I felt a pair of cold ice hands on my forehead. Rubbing slow circles into my skull.

Those two hands belonged to the most beautiful boy I had ever seen. His hair was a shiny bronze color and his eyes where a deep green. His thin structured face was twisted with worry.

I was so stunned by what I was seeing that I couldn't move. I could understand what was happening.

_I must be dreaming_.

He looked like one of the angels that you see in old paintings. So glorious in his beauty. Almost to much to take in.

I remember Gran use to take me to church every Easter. Just me and her. Before she died of cancer She use to tell me stories about every saints and angels. I thought they were so beautiful and when she died my mother told me she was with the angels. I wasn't so upset then. I knew she was in a better place with all her beloved angels.

Then it hit me. All the soft light. The angel.

"I'm dead" I said in an eerie calm. My throat was raspy and dry.

He looked at me and wrapped me in his arms so quickly I didn't have time to think if it was appropriate or not.

"Shhh. My sweet Isabella." He cooed gently as if calming a small child. "Your not dead my love. Your safe . No one can hurt you know. Where together. No one can take you away from me. Your safe" He repeated the last line over and over again. He was starting to sound frantic and I was beginning to get afraid.

I tried to pull away but his grip on me only tightened and I was so close to his chest that I could hear his heart beat.

In the silence my mind started to work again.

This wasn't heaven. I was alive and in a strangers house in his bed. With him wrapped around me so tight I couldn't breathe.

This is bad.

_Get out of there_! My mind screamed at me.

Very quickly I pushed him off of me and got out of the bed as fast as my clumsy, stumbling legs could take me.

I stood and looked at him. He looked confused and hurt.

"Bella." He said sternly get back to bed. "You shouldn't be up, your hurt my love. You need your rest."

Love?

He stretched his arms toward me begging me with his eyes to accept him.

"No." I said with out thinking.

His face changed then. It was no longer calm and worried. It was replaced by one of pure control. His face held no expression. His mouth in a straight line.

My fear spiked.

His dominate stare pierced threw me. I felt exposed, naked and completely undone.

"What did you say?" His eyes never left mine. He looked at me head on without flinching.

I felt my face go hot and my heart pounding against my ribs. My throat tightened in fear. The tension was unbearable.

"I-I-I." stuttered had no idea what to say. I tried to stop staring into his blazing emerald eyes and compose myself.

I just needed to get out of here far far far away from him.

My mind was totally blank and I lost the courage that I once had.

His eyes held me in a hypnotic trance. I felt like a mouse in a snakes vicious icy grip.

We both stood unmoving in silence. I could no longer think of what to say to make this situation better ,only worse.

But I knew that I would fight him. Not with fists. God I could barely hit a volley ball without it bruising my knuckles. NO! I would fight with my mind my heart. Those things I would keep from him .The very essence of who I was will not be touched by him.

I have to leave.

"I have to go. I-I have to leave -" I willed my self to look away- to break this hold he had over me.

His face contorted in anger and he got up from the bed and came toward me.

I tied to run for the door but tripped. I prepared my self to feel the pain. Before I fell a pair of strong hands held me.

"Be careful my little Bella" I struggled in his arms. That seemed to make him angry.

"Listen to me Isabella." He said in a dangerously silky voice only inches from my face. His tone was low but his voice was anything but comforting. His green eyes still on me.

"I have given you time. I let you go before. But don't think I'll do it again. Your mine. You where young then. Still a child. I knew you needed time to grow up." He held my cheek affectionately. I was too hypnotized by his green eyes to react to his touch. "I did not love you any less for it. I knew you still needed the comfort of your parents. You needed to grow into the beautiful woman I see in front of me."

He smiled a handsome crooked grin. He looked so sincere.

What was he talking about?

I have never seen him before in my life. I think he had me confused with someone else. Or maybe he's just crazy.

I really hope that this was all a misunderstanding.

"Its all over. You are ready for me. Now that time is over - thank god! I didn't know how much longer I could take without being with you. Holding you. Smelling your sweet skin."

He pulled me into a tight embrace. He dipped down and at the top of my head and inhaled.

I felt my face go hot and the room was spinning slightly.

_Fight_.

I had to leave. He was getting so close that I could feel his breathe on my skin. He was way to close for comfort. I was burning from the heat from our to bodies together.

Space. I need space.

He stood very silent . He was so deep in thought. Nuzzling my neck.

I decided know was the best time to strike.

I pushed him away and made a mad dash for the door. I prayed that I wouldn't fall again.

He quickly caught me just as my hand grazed the door knob. His arms roped around my waist lifting me off the ground.

"No no. Isabella do you think you can run from me?" He chuckled then. "Don't you know how much stronger I am compared to you?" I was to busy kicking my legs back and forth. Screaming for him to let me go.

"Yell all you like. This rooms sound proof." And I did. I continued to yell as he made our way to the bed.

The bed? Oh no!

I wasn't ready for this.

This cant be happening!

My body tensed and I tried to fight him harder. Traitorous tears flooding from my eyes.

"Stop! Please!" He threw me on the bed gently. I got up but he was sitting on my legs. He noticed my attempt to escape and grabbed my hands and pinned them to the silk covered bed.

_What should I do? What should I do?_

I was yelling to myself. I had never been this close to anyone physically and it was both scary and exciting. I hated him even more and I hated my body for loving the feeling of his cold strong arms holding me.

This couldn't be happening . I was getting violated by a stranger.

He lowered his head and place smooth soft kisses on my forehead.

_Hate him. _I told my body.

I knew yelling would be pointless and so would fight him. So I did what I always do when I cant handle something. I shut down. I closed my eyes and went limp.

He felt my hesitation.

"Don't fight me." He murmured his cool breath tickling my ear." your body loves this. It knows who you belong to. And so will you"

I did not belong to him. Isabella Marie Swan was her own woman. She will **not **be giving into you!

"Finally I have you all to myself." He tenderly. "Your mine know"

This was to intense. I couldn't handle the emotional over load. The fear, confusion, terror, pleasure , guilt, desire, sorrow, and lust was too much all at once.

My eyes began to spot and I was starting to feel dizzy.

And then I fainted


	2. His Heart

**I do not own Twilight or its Character. They just live in my world.**

Bella-18

Edward- 22

_**EPOV**_

I let out and anguished cry.

I sat on my white leather sofa and reviewed the profiles again.

_Wrong. _

_No._

_Not big enough._

All of them were just not good enough.

I thought as I was flipping through possible real estate to buy. None of them were perfect. Everything had to be absolute. I wanted my future bride to be absolutely happy in the home I choose for our family. Every detail had to be precise.

Bella has been 18 for 8 days now and I was getting more and more impatient.

Just then my cell phone began to ring.

"Cullen." I answered.

"Yes hello Mr. Cullen. This is Grace Stuart your Real-estate agent .I -I was just wondering if.. If all the homes where to your liking. No! I mean if y-you found one you were interested in." she said nervously.

" No Miss Stuart I did not. I would however like it if you keep trying.'

"Of- Of course Mr. Cullen. I'll get right on that ."she stuttered

"Good night Miss Stuart ." I said curtly and hung up the phone.

I was tired of disappointments tonight.

I got up and went to my bedroom.

I removed my tie and shoes and fell on the bed. The white sheets held no comfort for me. Nothing did.

Nothing went right. My plan was to get My Isabella on her 18 birthday. But trying to find her the perfect house was hard and I would not budge. As much as I want Bella , I want her to be happy more then I want to please myself.

I put my hands through my hair almost pulling at the roots. I swear I was going to be bald soon. I looked at my modern apartment and saw only loneliness.

I did not want that for our home. This lifeless shelter above the Seattle skyline. It was beautiful but not as wonderful as having our own space away from the prying eyes of the city. Also the crime rate was not to my liking. I don't think id ever let her leave the apartment.

I shudder what would happen to her in such a big town. She was to beautiful and innocent for her own good.

Our home would be isolated. A place of just for us.

I smiled at the thought.

_Our Home._

I was more then ready for us to start our lives together. Id been ready for the past three years.

I hated my apartment. I hated that it was so clean and new. Barely looked lived in. Painted white. White everywhere. Filled with modern furniture. Some futuristic art. Twisted metal sculptures. Fake white palm trees. High tech state of the art electronics.

No that it didn't have its upsides to.

It was close to my office. Had great parking. It was near every club restaurant and store you would want to get into. The apartment complex housed lots of famous, beautiful and obscenely rich people. The Seattle skyline lit up magically at night. Only the best for the best. I made sure of it.

It was great on paper.

Seattle's finest.

A bachelors paradise.

It even had a beautiful view.

But what was a beautiful view if you have to look at it alone.

Every. Single. Day.

To be honest I didn't just hate my apartment. I hated most places I stayed long enough to think. I hated thinking because at the back of my mind I knew I wasn't whole.

I had this knowing feeling that I was not complete.

A vacant space.

One thing I knew about myself is that I hated the feeling of not being the best. I always made sure I was not lacking in any way. No matter what I do.

But this feeling wouldn't go away.

It was like I had a huge hole in the middle of my body and no one cared to tell me that it was there.

But I knew.

I felt it every day.

I tried to fill that hole with music, books school and work. Nothing worked. But that didn't stop me from learning four languages. Or playing my piano until I thought my fingers would fall of. Reading and re reading every book and magazine Carlisle had. Nor did it stop me from getting my masters in business two years early. Or owning my own company at 2i.

Nothing worked.

Those thing just keep my mind off of my horrible loneliness.

The harder I tried the more I noticed this desolate space within myself.

In my teenage years it became I hunger. I began to rebel but ended up hurting myself.

I let out another deep sigh and turned over.

Something caught my eye. The only personal possession I had in this apartment.

It was a picture of the only the thing that made my life worth living. My sweet Bella.

I grabbed the picture frame and sat upright to examine the picture better.

But there really was no need I already memorized every curve , every line and every shade of my sweet brown eyed beauty.

I traced her lithe silhouette.

It was my favorite picture. She was walking home from the library on a lovely spring day. It was one of the rare days that she wore her silky mahogany hair down. It tumbled down to her shoulder in gently banana curls. She had just cut it the day before. She was wearing a tasteful flowery dress with a white wrap to protect her from the cold. She looked innocent her face serene as she was lost in a novel she had taken out. Her deep brown doe eyes fixed on the text. Her heavy lashes touched her cheeks. Lost in her own world.

As I was lost in her.

I smiled to myself. My ache lessens and I try to get a few hours of sleep.

I dreamt of the first time I saw my sweet Bella.

Although I have this dream several times, I never get bored of it.

It was the first summer I came home for college. Esme had practically forced me to come and spend time with the family. It was an unusually bright day.

After a few hours home I was dying to get away.

My skin was boiling.

It wasn't that I didn't love my family. I did very much. If Carlisle and Esme did not adopt me I don't think I'd be much of anything right now. My aunt and uncle are truly the finest people I had ever had the pleasure of being with. There house was always filled with love and understanding. Even in my slightly rebellious teenage years.

I even loved my annoying loud teddy bear of a brother, Emmet. Even Alice with her incessant badgering for me to update my wardrobe. It was so frustrating that she was almost always right. It was like she saw into the future.

But over the years it got worse.

Emmet was in the TV room teaching Rosalie how to play a grand theft auto game.

"Let me teach you how to work my stick.'' Emmett said suggestively

I heard a smack and smirked.

Rosalie was as beautiful as she was vicious. I was surprised she was allowed out of Emmett's room. He usually left her in there so she wouldn't escape. Not that she could the house had top of the line surveillance equipment. It was more for her benefit. He didn't want to punish her.

I walked down stairs as Esme called us all down for dinner. Candles were lit. Fresh flowers were placed on top of a clean white linen table cloth. The silverware was shining and the smells from the kitchen were incredible. This only might one thing. Tonight was a very special night for one of us.

A courtship.

I sat and watched my sister proudly introduce the family to the love of her life. Jasper Whitlock. She was practically bouncing of the walls.

The tall blonde stood quietly and introduced himself politely. A southern gentlemen with a southern drawl. He was a very stoic person as I began to observe throughout the meal. He only spoke when someone talked to him directly.

He ate his chicken silently as Alice being Alice dominated the conversation.

Emmet asked him how he liked the chicken of the _north_.

"The chicken is good.'' He said mildly and continued to eat his food slow and steady.

No funny business. Even his posture was stiff. His face without emotion.

I smirked .Alice was all was none of these things. She was his complete opposite. She was bubbly were he was impassive. She was social butterfly while he was a wallflower. I doubted if even his southern charm could win Alice's heart forever. They seemed utterly incompatible.

But as I looked around the table and saw my family interact with there partners, lovers, soul mates what ever you wanted to call it, I felt completely alone.

I watched as Esme teased Carlisle about how much salt he puts on his potatoes. Emmett making completely inappropriate gestures under the table as Rosalie fighting the urge to hit him and rolled her eyes. Alice and Jasper talking quietly holding hands. Even Jaspers stern exterior melted with Alice's embraces. The look of content on there faces made my chest tighten.

I was envious. Yes. Not of what they had, but what I didn't have.

My appetite was gone. I felt nauseas and hot.

I wiped my mouth and quickly excused myself from the table. I made sure to leave fast enough so Esme would cause a fuss over it.

I grab my key and drove away.

I put my favorite CD in and just drove aimlessly.

I felt so horrible. Never and I mean never did I fell like a failure.

But I did.

I drove for a hour until I stopped at a little beach. The small wooden sign said La Push Beach.

I got out of my car and just sat there letting the wind violently whipped my hair. The sun hit my skin peacefully. It felt nice.

There were tourists here with obnoxiously ugly shirts that was obviously bought from a near by gift shop. Little children collecting shells and screaming. Running and tripping. Not the peaceful getaway I had planned.

I started to walk top a less people friendly part of the beach.

It was rocky and had small poodles full of tiny fish.

I sat on a the biggest boulder and watched these small fish swim in there cramped rocky circle.

"Bella" a man said cautiously "Not to close alright."

I'm guessing it was a fathers voice. The level of concern was to close to the surface.

"Char- dad I'm fine. The other kids get to walk by themselves." I heard a young girls say in annoyance.

"I'm 15 for gosh sakes!" she mumbled under her breath.

I smiled I remember when I was that young. I thought I was invincible to.

I still had not turned around. I was vaguely reminded when Esme would follow me outside until I put on my jacket. I snorted to myself.

I was waiting for them to pass me as many of the tourists did.

I kept anticipating for her to pass me . After twenty minutes I began to get irrationally anxious. I fought not to look back. After another five minutes I caved.

I looked back and saw the most beautiful girl. She was completely angelic. Her skin was the color of porcelain. She was just as small and petite. Her thin body hunched over examining the aquatic life in the small rocky pools. She bit her lips in determination.

Her lips.

They were begin to be kissed.

My lips tingled at the thought.

They looked sweet and juicy. Like a ripe peach. She had the most giving lips. The top was a bit fuller then the bottom giving her mouth unintended sensuality.

Her eyes were the color of melted milk chocolate with little flex's of gold. Her mahogany hair constricted in a tight pony tail. The small strands of lose hair was tousled by the wind.

In that moment . No in that second, I had never been more sure of my future. Of my life. Of the universe. My frantic mind came to a halt and settled into a rare peace. Tranquil and calming. I felt like a drowning man finding shore.

It felt better then that. I couldn't grab for words to describe this feeling. I could only describe it as the big gapping hole in my chest was complete. My ravenous hunger filled.

I found my other half.

My heart.


End file.
